Category: Reflections

Give them what they want, not what is require

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It is said, that in ancient China, one rich man wanted to get a mouse statue  for decoration. He held a competition, where he send request to all statute makers to participate in competition. When statue makers visited him. He told them his requirements, and held a prize who statue is so beautiful that his cat also confuse and snatch it.

On the competition day, all statute workers visited him, with his work. One young person comes with statue that is not so beautiful. When all statute placed in hall, all statue made fun of him.

But when rich man, visited the hall, he also not like his master piece.  But young man, asked him that in invitation there is requirement, that his cat will confuse with mouse is original or not.

So as per rules, cat have to decided that competition. Rich man laughed at him, and told them it is symbolic. Not actual. For just joke, he brought his cat in hall. When cat saw these mouse, instead to second look on all other mouses, she took the mouse of young person and run away.

Young person laughed and demand his prize. Because his fish was so beautiful that rich man’s cat confused and take it like a real mouse. Actually he made that mouse with fish meat.

Rich man surprised and gave him the prize.

Our life is such a way. Usually as consultant. We know what is best for client. But we have to give them what they want. Yesterday, I made a document, and they did not understand what is major meaning. They just search the exact word, they gave. So objective meanings were lost. Later I start to understand them, how they work. And produce the work as wishes for them.

Age is just a number

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I found my age on companies portal is 1994. I don’t know, as outsource consultant, they mistakenly added it. Entry was intentionally. Whatever is the reason, with respect to that my age is 29 years.

As I surprised, that actually I found right, My maturity is not exceeded from 29 years.

It is good, because I am still young, I am look and work 10 year younger then my age.

But sad same time, I feel, that I did not grow from the age of 29 years. I need to work on way.

Age is in mind of person. But that true with the age we are die day by day. The energies are going low day by day.

Need to more focus on fitness.

I already reduce my diet. Almost half. But with this my energy level starts to decrease.

I did not start exercise properly. But start half burpee. I cannot take pushups. I feel pain in joint of my right hand. On normal move I did not found any pain. So I have to do other exercise.

When I reach to 100 burpee without push up step. I will start adding other exercise.

The point is just start, start small, but start today.

6 ways to see the glass as half full

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Brian Tracy states, “Optimism is the quality more associated with success and happiness than any other”. A human is a rational creature. He always has this scenario that his future will be better than his past and present. Thinking that his children are overly intelligent, his business will be prosperous, and his undying hope of never getting divorced in a marriage is all part of the optimistic human brain. The belief of almost every human being on this planet to think that the future will be better than the present and past is called optimism bias. Seeing the glass half full is a victorious approach and leads you to see opportunities. Pessimism kills opportunities.

 Is optimism hardwired?

Optimism is something inbuilt into the human race. We tend to abide by all the positivity and hope in our life situations. It is thought to be part of evolution. We tend to think and imagine all constructive scenarios. We never think about the destructive things that can end our careers or academics. Optimism is hardwired into human brains since birth. We hope for the best; try our best; give our best. There was a survey conducted in 2005  revealed the existence of optimism in young children as well as adults. It was thought-provoking.

There are many examples in our surroundings of the optimistic approach.

For example, there were two friends John and Kevin. They both gave trials for the national football team. But they failed to get into the team. the character of John is someone who always looks for hope in the mountain of rubble. In contrast, Kevin is someone who always thinks of contradictory situations. Kevin is someone who never gets hopeful and confident about the situation.  John thought of trying harder next year and getting on the football team with more enthusiasm. The coach gave him an excellent feedback that he used as fuel to burn more fiercely next time. Kevin didn’t make use of that and remained a failure. Who is more likely to practice more and try again? Is it Kevin or John?

If you ever want to bring change, it starts with yourself. If we mentally prepare ourselves to do one thing, we can achieve anything in the world. A mentally strong person can conquer the world. An optimistic mind is a sign of a strong belief. Being an optimist motivates you to keep going forward. It’s a skill you can develop with time and patience.

            “  Part of being optimistic is keeping one’s head pointed towards the Sun, and one’s feet moving forward.”  Nelson Mandela

I have said a lot about optimism. Let’s just develop ways to practice optimism and see things as a glass half full. 

Think and talk continually about your goals

An optimist will always think about the future without letting himself dwell in the past. He always thinks in the best lights and scenarios. Why do we burn ourselves in the agony of past mistakes? Either we should let them go or learn from them. The past is not gonna come ever. Let the bygones be bygones. An optimistic approach never sticks to past mistakes. Instead, it aims at learning from those mistakes. Human psychology plays a crucial role in determining your health status. The more you are hopeful towards things; the lesser the chances of deterioration of your health. Think about your goals and analyze your present position. It’s never too late to become triumphant. 

Always look for the solution 

Honestly speaking we have become a lazy generation. This laziness doesn’t let us achieve anything. We love our comfort zone and we tend to choose it every time. People having the potential of doing something are also restricted to their zones these days. We cannot achieve our goals until we leave our comfort zones. Success is not something that can be achieved by doing parties and resting all the time. It demands hard work, dedication and consistency. A lazy mind never looks for the solution to problems. A lazy person here is depicted as a pessimist. If one plan fails then he will not look for an alternate. He will just consider it destiny and will return to his comfortable couch. Whenever an optimist becomes stuck in a problem the first question that arises in his mind is:

What’s the plan B now? What can I do to make it better? 

Try finding ways. You will surely come up with something. It is better to have something in your hands than nothing. Practising these things will change your mindset one day eventually. An optimist person takes the initiative immediately and starts working on it. They don’t wait for things to happen; they make things happen. Quit making excuses and try to be a more practical person.

Avoid pessimism 

The counterpart to every emotion exists in this universe. Where there is love there is hate. Similarly where there is optimism; there is pessimism. Choose your company wisely. Friends and family play a vital role in building your self-esteem and confidence. If you are by chance unfortunate then these two can help you destruct your self-esteem as well. So try to be cautious about choosing your people. Never let anyone ruin your positive energy. If anyone brings negative energy by complaining about people and worldly things then kick them out instantly. 

“To be of good quality, you have to excuse yourself from the presence of shallow and callow-minded individuals” Michael Bassey

Body language matters 

A person’s body language tells a lot about his personality and mindset. A person with a dull and low-witted mindset will always have deep down shoulders and head facing the ground like he is the culprit of some undone crime. Whereas a confident person is always chinned up with broad shoulders facing the audience. These gestures throw a positive impression towards the audience making them think that you are a highly self-esteemed individual. If you are a beginner, you may be reluctant to do it. But still do it anyway. Fake it till you make it.

Laughter is a wine for the soul

A good laugh can help you heal a lot of hurts. Why do comedians live longer than normal people? It is just because they are masters at presenting everything humorous. Surround yourself with people who make you laugh frequently. Or just become a comedian. I think that does not cost much. According to a study at Maryland university, it is revealed that laughing helps increase blood flow. It helps reduce the risk of coronary diseases. It releases endorphins that reduce your cravings, stress, and anxiety and makes you feel cheerful. When there are this many benefits of laughing. Then what are you guys waiting for?

Exercise 

It not only keeps you in shape but also helps in releasing endorphins in the body. Endorphins are the happy hormones keeping you cheerful and optimistic all day. So what’s keeping you from exercising? Let’s do this, fellas!

Thanks for reading!

Who am i.

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Issi talaash -o-tajassus mein Kho gaya  hun main , Agar nahi hun to kiyun’kar Jo hun to keya hun main

Who am i.

Most important and toughest journey is journey within. Who are you, What are you strength. What are your weakness.

What are your trigger points. From other they can control you. But there are more things. How I learn. How read.

Some people are reader. Some are listener. For getting good leader or manager you can also understand. Are you reader or Are you listener.

What are your values. Values lies what things you want in you. You qualities you want inside you. For this you have to do mirror check.

I listen one quwali. “Jaare lokakn nayee apny app nu jaan liaya, oh log juda hoo jandayee naayee”

Those who understand who are they, They are become different.

I read some where, what you do when you are alone, that is only your reality.

You have to accept your past mistakes, That helps you to peace. You have to embrace your flaws. That make you more beautiful. You have to accept yourself.

That is ultimate self love.

Be happy with being you. Love your flaws. Own your quirks. And know that you are just as perfect as anyone else, exactly as you are.

Ariana Grande

I was reading somewhere. In ancient time the words inscription at the temple of Oracle of Delphi “ Know yourself”.

I was sitting of my hindu friend, he talk about me all answer lie with in yourself. books, readings, knowledge generated layers on you. I was surpised that is same message what Baba bulleh shah told you. Then I feel. Possible what ever situation you have. What ever problem you face. You have to look inside you. What should you do.

I was listening Satu Guru, he told the same idea, Some one asked him Do he have knowledge of everything. He replied. he did not know everything. He just know himself. What ever question comes to him most of the time about life problems and situation. He put himself in that question and got all answers. What he should do and reply.

But here is another question. Would that answer 100 percent applicable to you. I am sure not. Because you are different form the rest of others. You have to know yourself. And remove all layers of knowledge and just seek answer with in yourself.

“Phar phar aalim fasal houon kaadif apnay aap nu parayha hee nahee”

Why you consider what others said about you.

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I was in kitchen. My resign is accepted. I was in office and I got reply on email. Deliver these things and leave. He did not want to meet me. What ever is the reason. It is normal case.

When you did not have work for some one. Its better to layoff. I am facing the same problem from last one year. Any how its better for me.

In book winning Jack Welch said that, when need of a person completed. Or services for a person is not required. Fired him. Its good for him. both in terms of weight on companies expense and for him also. He will go outside and will find something good and will grow. In USA and European market they use better term Lay off.

I was in kitchen. Two sweet ladies form admin and HR standing in kitchen. HR lady make fun of me. Boss was so busy he did not consider to meet him. And then second lady spoke. Let him go, later we discuss and talk on this asshole. I enjoyed their conversation. I felt sad about those ladies and also for my self.

But why I considering their discussion. The Four agreement book Ruiz Don Miguel said, Second Agreement nothing take personal.

Its all about them. What they think of me. And they make fun of their organization not about me. They are making fun of owner of company not about me.

My friends. Every thing that hurts you has two solution. If you can change it do it. If you can not change it, just accept it.

Many times we hurt because our mind did not accept that fact. And when ever we start to resist it it starts to hurt us. So best way is accept it and stop resist it. It will pass.

Patience Patience my friend patience is name of game.

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We Pakistani are very impatience nation. We need everything urgent. And when results are not coming we become impatience.

Today I was standing in Business Bay metro station and waiting for Bus. And it was not coming. Waiting waiting and waiting. It took 15 minutes to come. I was impatient. Why It usually came with in 5 minutes. Why late. I am getting late form office. My target to reach office at 8 o clock. Office hours are flexible we have to reach before 9:30. It took almost 28 minutes to reach office from Business bay metro station to office where I am working at the time of writing this post. Then I realize that where is problem. Problem is in bus that it came late or I did not make margin of this extra time.

rumi quote came into my mind. “ When I was young, I want to change the world. Now I am wise, I want to change myself”.

What about I start my journey to office 15 minutes early. If I forget to charge my mobile. Why not have extra mobile charger in my laptop bag. What if, I make a plan one day a head.

Life never goes according to our plan. I have to add some margin in it.

Mr Jimmy Dean or If he was possible Pakistani then certainly his name would be Jimmy ul Dean once said.

“I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.”

I read some where, “ Successful people are those who do self evaluate themselves”. And Self Evaluation is really painful. Difficult and painful to accept that fault, mistake or situation happens due to your lack of knowledge or proper handling. Only then you have to correct it. Acceptance requires patience with self.

Patience means, bear the current situation and be prepare that this situation never happen. or happen you have to handle it in better way.

Is reward or penalty help us to correct ?

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I want to reach office 8 o clock. But Unable to make it habit. Office timing is flexible . Office time starts at 8.am and finish at 6 pm. with 30 to 1 hour lunch break.

You have to reach before 9:30. After that deduction starts. As software developer, I used to come late. That habit was due to we work for remote USA and European clients. And we have to give at least 3 to 4 hours over lap to client timing.

Here in Dubai, where I am working. After 7 o clock bus starts to come with delay. But before 7 it comes with in 15 minutes. It means, If you miss the bus with in 15 minutes bus will come. But if you missed the bus after 7 o clock delay will be more then 30 to 40 minutes. So I decided to come early. Here office Government strict rule for work for 9 to 10 hours. Not like Pakistan, that we have to work 24 by 7. Here we have to left office on time. Some times we have to work from home after office hours.

So I decided to come early. Its very difficult to sleep one hour early and awake a hour early. In the morning. I wasted 30 to minutes in bed just I wake. When I reach bus stand. it was 7:40.

It is unable to reach office on 8 am. I decided to give me little penalty. I called taxi and reach office 7:58 am. I have to pay 21 dhirm to taxi. No break fast.

The pain of 21 Dhirm, Hurts me. Which is 21 *60 Pkr. This pain helps me to come office. Awake early.

I think pain and pleasure helps us to change. I can spent this 21 dhirm in better way. Will this approach will work.

How to take better decisions

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Take your responsibility of your decision.

If you stay happy if you take decision. There will be no regret if you take your own decision.

Two types of people who are decision makers, and second who are advisor.

Listen advise from those people who did something in specific area of life.

When you take decision focus on following points.

What is your present situation.

What you want or change you want as result of your decision.

What benefit you got as results.

What prices you have to pay or left things to get results.

Find you why this will help you stay focus on decision.

Every failure is missing opportunity

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I was sitting with my friend, he talks about how he fired from his first job. When his father knows this. he celebrated this event. Because, he know, it big event in his son life. Now he thinks about why this happen and what he need to improve. In true picture, fire from job is one of those event who let us think. And interestingly my friends also learned from it.

Learn from failure is one of those thing, if we implement this in our life. We will improve a lot.

What are best way to greet in workspace

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Salam, Namsastye, Maskaram, Sat Sri Akal or just say good morning

Let me share my own story.

When I used to enter office. I used to say, Hello, Good morning, As salam u alakum. Namaskaram.

But strange event happens. Today, when I entered office. I used to say greeting to every one in such a way. One lady start to object me, why you are saying Namaskaram. It is Namaste or if you do it do it proper way and hands pressed together. Other wise don’t say it. If you want to learn something. Learn in proper way. It is very strange behavior for me.

At that point I did not understand the difference of Namaskaram and Namasty.

Most of Indian working in Dubai are from south side. They used to say Namaskar or Namaskaram. And North India called Namaste.

Point is right possible. Every good morning greeting has some ritual. We can not understand different culture and follow them. Why you use their terms when we can not understand.

So It was socking for me also. So I love to greet every one. Because it was teach me at home to create with every one. That habit I bring from my home country Pakistan.

Later I realize that only words like “Good morning” is more then enough.

Instead to say, Aslam-ul-Akum. Namastay, Namasakram or Sat Sirya kaal. You just need to say, Good morning, Good evening or Good after noon.

So point is when people are from different culture learn their tradition properly. Other wise just follow the common things.

So that is. When you go to multicultural workspace. Only say Good morning. No need to go in depths of efforts.