40 is new 20

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It said, life’s half blessings are gone at 40. At age of 44 I feel the same. Enough fat stored in my body.

Bad cholesterol has its peak. Prediabetic condition.

A lot of things gone. But now if I did not focus on my health, complication starts to appear. As result food starts to reduce. I have to control my hunger. It is little tougher. For example, If I want to eat 4 chapati, Now I stop at 2.  I start to adjust myself. I can’t stop hunger at night. Since childhood, night dinner is one of the best food in life. Abu ( My father) came back from office and we all sit together and eat.

We discussed different matters and that was my best part of life. That I am unable to continue due to expat life. Working different areas of world.

Due to that habit, I can skip breakfast and even lunch but cannot stop eating at night. It’s really difficult.

I reduce my diet. Previously I took two to three cups of milk tea, with one tea spoon sugar.  But now one cup. And if I need second, I tried to control it. But some times, when I feeling little tired or feeling headache, then I take second of tea.   I started to drink black coffee in office instead to have milk tea and green tea.

Now its time, so started one hour walk. Riyadh, is quite different city. And I am at Riyadh, but that is not actual Riyadh. Even here,  a lot of traffic. I walking at least one hour. Try to complete 10000 steps. Long walk. Along the busy street, Only I am walking and start small running or jogging. I start feeling I got little stamina. When I visited

Bellevue  at Microsoft MVP summit, I saw that men and women, running along the edges of busy streets. I did not saw this trend here in Riyadh. Probably, I am in the area, which is part of Riyadh, but not actual Riyadh.

Riyadh is amazing.

I listen one of the podcast of Gary Vee. I like him due to his bold speeches. He told at 40 he saw just 20 years more.

I think life also starts at 40, When our mind is at fullest, but at the same times, our energies starts to decline.

Our end starts to visible. And we starts to take decision more seriously.

We start to think more clearly. We start to think in such a way ” Begin with end in mind”.  Means, we start focusing more about output of any task before starting it. ” faida kay hayee” what really in it to do so.

What end result we want from this situation or act. Our why start to appear more clearly.

We start focusing less on what other say or said. We start to ignore unnecessary battles.

Our focus on savings increase.

We start to listen more, Instead to saying.

Life is good, if we accept as it is. “That’s is the way “

At 40 life little good. The things start to change. Our shift starts to change. But more importantly. A few friends starts to gone.

Do Dreams impact on our life

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Did dream impact on life. Yesterday I saw a dream, I saw similar type of dreams, couples of time.

A lot of cats attacking me. And I am fighting with them.

Do dreams have impact on our life. I think, it is reflection of what we think all the day, or it is our subconscious mind. It reflects our fear. And interestingly our dream comes in deep sleep.

Life is full of stress. When I start tracking my sleep. I found, that most of the time my sleep is normal.

It varies between 5 to 9 hours. Some time it is less than 4 hours or even 3 hours per night.

Less sleep is result of stress or result of our fast place night life.

It was deep sleep. In the morning, I feel little discomfort feeling still sleepy. Ramdan is going on. And I have fasting. Without taking Iftar. But so did not take tea, or coffee. I need good amount of nicotine.

So dream creates in our subconscious mind. It is result of thoughts most of time negative in  our mind. Why negative, most of time we are hard wire with negative thoughts. That is due to our survival instinct.

From stone age to till modern day. Danger is everywhere. Anything we do, possible result in negative results.

How we have to defend ourself in the case of worse.

Most of the time, our sub-conscious mind warn about something. When I search about a lot of cats attacking me and I am defending myself and fighting against them. It means, my mind warns about a of challenges. As I am beating them. It means, I am facing them. But problems exists.

Later I found, that I involve in many different type of works in my life. For example

I want a cooking youtube channel. I want motivational channel. And then I want a blog. And then one channel for my professional so I can stay updated and can show myself as expert in my field.

And then I have 9 to 5 job full time. And as project goes move smooth. It requires a lot of challenges as well.

Same time I want to lose weight. And Also want to learn arabic.  Then I also want to talk to all of my friends and family member.

So all these things need time and attention. According to my understanding, my subconscious mind try to tell me to focus on small subset of things to get results. Al these appears to be as cats.

So my mind told me to stay focus on a few things and deliver them in good way. Instead to make a lot of challenges. Just focus on a few.

6 ways to see the glass as half full

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Brian Tracy states, “Optimism is the quality more associated with success and happiness than any other”. A human is a rational creature. He always has this scenario that his future will be better than his past and present. Thinking that his children are overly intelligent, his business will be prosperous, and his undying hope of never getting divorced in a marriage is all part of the optimistic human brain. The belief of almost every human being on this planet to think that the future will be better than the present and past is called optimism bias. Seeing the glass half full is a victorious approach and leads you to see opportunities. Pessimism kills opportunities.

 Is optimism hardwired?

Optimism is something inbuilt into the human race. We tend to abide by all the positivity and hope in our life situations. It is thought to be part of evolution. We tend to think and imagine all constructive scenarios. We never think about the destructive things that can end our careers or academics. Optimism is hardwired into human brains since birth. We hope for the best; try our best; give our best. There was a survey conducted in 2005  revealed the existence of optimism in young children as well as adults. It was thought-provoking.

There are many examples in our surroundings of the optimistic approach.

For example, there were two friends John and Kevin. They both gave trials for the national football team. But they failed to get into the team. the character of John is someone who always looks for hope in the mountain of rubble. In contrast, Kevin is someone who always thinks of contradictory situations. Kevin is someone who never gets hopeful and confident about the situation.  John thought of trying harder next year and getting on the football team with more enthusiasm. The coach gave him an excellent feedback that he used as fuel to burn more fiercely next time. Kevin didn’t make use of that and remained a failure. Who is more likely to practice more and try again? Is it Kevin or John?

If you ever want to bring change, it starts with yourself. If we mentally prepare ourselves to do one thing, we can achieve anything in the world. A mentally strong person can conquer the world. An optimistic mind is a sign of a strong belief. Being an optimist motivates you to keep going forward. It’s a skill you can develop with time and patience.

            “  Part of being optimistic is keeping one’s head pointed towards the Sun, and one’s feet moving forward.”  Nelson Mandela

I have said a lot about optimism. Let’s just develop ways to practice optimism and see things as a glass half full. 

Think and talk continually about your goals

An optimist will always think about the future without letting himself dwell in the past. He always thinks in the best lights and scenarios. Why do we burn ourselves in the agony of past mistakes? Either we should let them go or learn from them. The past is not gonna come ever. Let the bygones be bygones. An optimistic approach never sticks to past mistakes. Instead, it aims at learning from those mistakes. Human psychology plays a crucial role in determining your health status. The more you are hopeful towards things; the lesser the chances of deterioration of your health. Think about your goals and analyze your present position. It’s never too late to become triumphant. 

Always look for the solution 

Honestly speaking we have become a lazy generation. This laziness doesn’t let us achieve anything. We love our comfort zone and we tend to choose it every time. People having the potential of doing something are also restricted to their zones these days. We cannot achieve our goals until we leave our comfort zones. Success is not something that can be achieved by doing parties and resting all the time. It demands hard work, dedication and consistency. A lazy mind never looks for the solution to problems. A lazy person here is depicted as a pessimist. If one plan fails then he will not look for an alternate. He will just consider it destiny and will return to his comfortable couch. Whenever an optimist becomes stuck in a problem the first question that arises in his mind is:

What’s the plan B now? What can I do to make it better? 

Try finding ways. You will surely come up with something. It is better to have something in your hands than nothing. Practising these things will change your mindset one day eventually. An optimist person takes the initiative immediately and starts working on it. They don’t wait for things to happen; they make things happen. Quit making excuses and try to be a more practical person.

Avoid pessimism 

The counterpart to every emotion exists in this universe. Where there is love there is hate. Similarly where there is optimism; there is pessimism. Choose your company wisely. Friends and family play a vital role in building your self-esteem and confidence. If you are by chance unfortunate then these two can help you destruct your self-esteem as well. So try to be cautious about choosing your people. Never let anyone ruin your positive energy. If anyone brings negative energy by complaining about people and worldly things then kick them out instantly. 

“To be of good quality, you have to excuse yourself from the presence of shallow and callow-minded individuals” Michael Bassey

Body language matters 

A person’s body language tells a lot about his personality and mindset. A person with a dull and low-witted mindset will always have deep down shoulders and head facing the ground like he is the culprit of some undone crime. Whereas a confident person is always chinned up with broad shoulders facing the audience. These gestures throw a positive impression towards the audience making them think that you are a highly self-esteemed individual. If you are a beginner, you may be reluctant to do it. But still do it anyway. Fake it till you make it.

Laughter is a wine for the soul

A good laugh can help you heal a lot of hurts. Why do comedians live longer than normal people? It is just because they are masters at presenting everything humorous. Surround yourself with people who make you laugh frequently. Or just become a comedian. I think that does not cost much. According to a study at Maryland university, it is revealed that laughing helps increase blood flow. It helps reduce the risk of coronary diseases. It releases endorphins that reduce your cravings, stress, and anxiety and makes you feel cheerful. When there are this many benefits of laughing. Then what are you guys waiting for?

Exercise 

It not only keeps you in shape but also helps in releasing endorphins in the body. Endorphins are the happy hormones keeping you cheerful and optimistic all day. So what’s keeping you from exercising? Let’s do this, fellas!

Thanks for reading!

Facing the fear.

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Most of the time, I run away the competition. Whenever someone challenge. I avoid the conflict. Later people make fun of me. If I look back, I found multiple reason for that. One of them, I was not satisfied with myself.

Sometimes, I found, but little bit guilt still now is. Can I fight for someone, In their life I am just options. Like spare tier in car , worthless. I have much better than this. Now I feel guilt.  Sometimes I think, let it to be, Let them happens to be.

Most of the time, I avoid the conflict due I have a fear of failing. What If I defeated. Actually, If I did not go in conflict, I already fail. And most importantly, I did not reorganize myself. I did not found that I have important position, But others things that I am competitor.

What is meaning of competition. Competition, happens between two people or more, who are trying to chase same thing or goal. What if, one of two competitor, don’t have same goal. Sometimes happens to me, things goals are not worthless.

But recently I face one of strange thing in my life. The great realization. Directly or un directly, if you did not face competition, You will ultimately lost. Everybody thinks about him or herself. And as result  if you will lose your wroth.

Second competition is good thing, It let you know your worth, helps you to improve. Even if you fail, you did not have regret.  Even if you are indirectly in competition. Then you have to understand your position. Your worth. And why that person feel competition. And If you lose that competition, what you lost in that conflict.

The only thing, understand yourself. Your worth, Your true potential. Where you should be. What’s in you from others feel competition.

No problem, just start from now. I just started. Note down all your strength. Write down all your weakness.

But start working only those weakness, that hurdle in your success. Because we can not work on all of our weakness. And even working on weakness, we can make midcore level strength. But if we work on our strength. We make it excellence.

You have to understand, why other feel competition.  What target goal, he wants to achieve. There is possible something which you ignored, but worth to compete.

My friends, people did not give path, you have to make your way in. And that is it way,

But more importantly, know what you want is more important, what other want and you are crossing their way.

Because, always chose the right battle.

What is problem. Why in stress

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Our thoughts creates stress.  From last couple of days I am facing high blood pressure. Blood pressure not alarming level. But need to focus on. So what are the reason for Blood pressure I am facing. I found I have stress.

  • Creativity stress
  • When I start to writing by my own. It creates pain in head.
  • Expectation too much
  • Fitness problem.
  • Financial problems.
  • Office work how to complete.
  • Learning curve.
  • Arabic learning challenge.

Are these problem are bigger then me or I am bigger than them.

Most of the time problems happens only when we are not organize.

If we start organize and note down all those things that bother us. Our stress level will come down.

Our mind is tool, which remind us what is important. And if we did not complete those pending task. It will start create panic. So best way is Brain dump. As David Allen said that our mind is not storing ideas.

So we have to write it down somewhere. And then set priority. And start working on them one by one.

Whenever mind start to remind. We also have some progress. And this will not create.

Second way is to understand, not everything is not our control. We can just control what we can do. What will out is not control. And what we say. Take life as it is. Its ok. Third way is god make us capable enough to meet all those challenges.

Focus on yourself not others.

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My horoscope that if Don’t go for Errands. Errands means, Do something for someone else on behalf.

How accurate my horoscope said. Sometimes surprise myself. Most of the time, we wasted our time. Instead we focus how we need to finish our own task doing well. We start to judge and help others how they need to do things. Today happens the same. My boss present a single slide what he need to present to top management of client. I have a lot of things to do, to finish things up. But instead focusing my work  and make it better and better, I intentionally start helping him  that things should be in that way, he should improve his work and things need to change.  He never asked my opinion. I even don’t know who is target audience whom he will going to present. Neither I am responsible for what he is going to present. The only point I have in my mind, that he is going to present whole team, so I need to help him.

Then I saw my horoscope on Horosocope.com. I surprised, it is accurate, no need to consider what other do,  I have to just focus on my improvement. What best thing I had to do is, access the issues and limitation on other work and used this this input for my own work. There are two reason for that.  One is people did not like criticism. It hurts they ego and they become enemy. Even if asked, never give the opinion. Until, he or she is your best friend, where he or she understand, what you are saying is benefit for them. Even then try to avoid it.

Second. It is nice way to understand other weaknesses and instead give them feedback. You need to check, are these things in you. Improve it.

Life is continues process for learning. We can not help people, until they realize by themselves, what need to improve and how to improve. Our only duty to improve ourself. If 1 percent daily. Learn and Improve.

If you want people have listen you follow this

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I was standing in office. A person who is acting solution architect. Purpose us “how to conduct session in right way”. And why it is important to do things in this way. My another fallow colleague is little aggressive nature. Also wanted to prove himself. He wanted to drive things by his own way. He also have THE cons and pros his approach of work. Both wanted to share their opinion And more importantly, How things need to be done and required form top management. Both tried to argue. But as result heated debate. I was silent. Just listen and Ignore.  Later one of guy was also angry with me, why I did not support him. And why not I tried to clear the situation. But I was just listen and ignore.

At that time I was concluded that both these guys have no authority to dictate us how to do work. Or We need to work in specific way.

How top management instructed us, we have to do things in their way. We have to follow. What if I do things in different but better way. Will our work is acceptable to management. They have to judge things in their own point of way, and we want to do things according to their requirement, or as compare.

These two people were just trying to share their experience. We did work in that way and it was working. And they fought to explain that things would need to done in this specific way.

But my experience said that we have to work according to requirement of management.

If you don’t have position or authority. Either you are subject matter or not. Keep silent, spoke only if asked. If you have position of power. People listen to you. In Punjabi we said

” Jadya gahar daanay othaye kaamaly we saayanaye”.

If you are nothing or low in ranking, no body listen to you. So You need to get position, try to take more responsibility, prove yourself and get position of authority. If you did not have position, If they ask you your opinion. Give them otherwise keep silent. Unfortunate sad truth is, world saw wealth and position before listen to other person. We have to follow the same.

Second point is it important to justify yourself, why to do things in specific way. My way is better than you. Why I am doing this and due to certain reason. Why we need to prove ourselves.

Third point, if some person want to share his opinion to you. Listen him with respect. But ignore him. Simple strategy is heard but not listen. There are noises in environment. But we did not listen these noises. We just listen those sound, which we want to give attention. There is no benefit to focus or give attention to everyone. Always focus on priority.

Dont waste time to share your opinion, until asked, Follow the authority, Ignore all, others just distraction. If you want people listen yourself, prove yourself and try to get position and go up to corporate ladder .. Get position and people follow you.

https://youtu.be/33RBeEhZIB8

Set Small goals, here is why

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If you are depress and feel loneliness. If you think you did not achieve what need to be achieve.

You are not at position where you must be. Then this video is for you.

My friends Some times big goals make us depress. We all have big dreams, but when we start achieving these dreams, It will take a lot long time. When results are not coming we quite and feel depress.

Solution to all these problem lies in setting small goals.

Start small goals, very small and start achieving them. That makes you happy, small achievements make you fullfilled and satisfied.

What about only 5 pushups per day.

what about only 30 minutes walk.

If your daily expense is 100 Rupees. Just save 5 rupees per day. What about just saving 1 rupee only. 1 dollar.

If unable to control on hunger, what about eat one fourth of Chapti less.

https://youtu.be/up_9pCAkalc

If you feel sad, what about just push yourself smile for one minute. Just remember good memories for one minute.

If you feel alone, instead to waiting for some one, why not just go start talking someone else. If some one say no, try some one else.

Unable to read book. What about just 1 page per day.

unable to write. What about 1 page or one paragraph per day.

You want to learn a new language. what about read or memories just 5 words only. repeat them.

If you worry about something, what about accept it and enjoy and laugh on it. let it happens.

Most of the time worries just lies in our head, they never happen.

If you don’t have any accomplishment in day, what about making your bed in the morning.

When you start achieving these small goals in day. you start building momentum.

Remember, half empty glass is also half full.

If you think, one day you will sit and complete the task for spending full day on It , that will never happen.

Just consider two hours per day and do it with full focus.

Success lies in compound effect. It is doing something consistency with long period of time.

remember journey of thousand miles begins with single step. Taking one step at time, just one step after another, and another and will it help you reach your destination.

See you in another video.

Learn to live with difficulties. But stay positive.

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I was travelling to Leap event, with one young saudi guy. Young but well educated and fast learning person. He told me that what I need to improve in myself.

He told me I have problem in communication. I am good at professional communication. My communication is always to the point but it unable to make human connection.

I asked him what due mean that. He told look what you asked when you came first time in office in saudi. Instead you ask about us, you just start asking about where are you living. Where I can get residence. Where are good restaurant.

I asked him, now things are good, Or I have same problem.

He replied. no now after 3 weeks things are good. You feel happy.

What I can I told him, there are multiple mishap happens. There are some mistakes happens. I was hired for job. And due to wrong input. My nationality marked as Indian. While I have passport of Pakistan. Second, When I travel to Saudi. The place where I reached. Told me to leave todays night because during sleep I was too much snoring. So I have to search my place in the very morning.

Or after coming to office I have to search office. What to do. The whole day my first day in office was too much depressed. A new city, No place to stay.

The real problem of outsource guy is, no body owns him. Nor a client nor the partner who hired him. Both focus on their savings. Partner wants to save his money and company wants both.

I was afraid what to do next. Here I have mistake. I have to call the company owner. But as most of the time. I solved my own problem. So I started searching.

Our onsite manager called in the evening and ask me about is problem and near his home, He showed me some places cheap hotels. Where I can get space. finally I got one space for 170 Rayal per day. And he told me to stay, and search. At night 11 Pm night I took my luggage and shifted to that place.

Finally one Pakistani Taxi driver helps me to get one Room.

I was too depress those days. Now things are settle down. It took me 3 weeks to cool down.

I can do things different. I am thinking that during this period of almost 1 week. If I stay more positive. Then It will help me to create more positive impression on my colleagues and client.

I am not blaming for anything. I am glade, I took responsibility and problem is solved. But other hand, If I stay positive in that situation, than believe that I will solve this problem without any person. Than, My behavior will much better.

What I learn and it is my conclusion for sharing this post.

Always stay in any situation.

If this situation happen due to your mistake or negligence. then learn from it.

If this situation un expected. then Its Life way to teach you to solve it.

Always remind, some higher power is taking care of you.

You must always have some extra money other then your bank account, credit card or Wallet purse. So in case of any problem you have.

So my friend this is my todays post. Regarding. Live and enjoy life with difficulties. There is always better solution for any problem. Believe in yourself.

I was all that

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Time passes, I am getting old. We have to accept the fact that we are old.

Here in Riyadh life is different, what is different from Dubai. It feels home. Another home. A lot of Arabic speaking people.

I am trying to learn arabic, But it take time.

I meet a lot of Pakistani here, As compare to Dubai, here a lot of Pakistan. Here is language Barear.

A lot of Pakistan. I meet a most most of Pakistan.

Yesterday, I meet a old

I asked him, did you have any girl friend. He replied, I am aged, and you are also aged, its time to pray “ Allah Allah karoo”.

You are also more then 40, its time to do “Allah Allah” pray. At that time It realized, I am aged.

If look back, I have a travel long long back. But still dealing with different people.

Some times I feel I am successful. But on the other hand I feel I am failure.

Currently working for one of biggest company of software companies. as outsource person. Still facing the challenge.

Where is the problem. Problem is I am not getting organize. My opponent is extremely good in communication. He is good in speaking.

But on the other hand, He is not good in delivering things.

When you have to compete others, you have to understand others. What are their weakness and what are their strengths.

But before that, you have to understand your own weakness and strength. I feel, my weakness is communication.

Now I have to work on my strengths. I have to play on my strengths.

So whats are your strength.